Thursday, January 24, 2008

In the words of Dr. Evil...


It's freakin cold!!!! Man I am getting sick of this single digit weather. Oh I know it is because of global warming and all and that I myself am to blame for eating beef, driving a car, exhaling, etc... here are some other things caused by global warming: too much snow, too little snow, hot weather, mild weather, glacial expansion, glacial recession, ocean salinity increases and decreases, etc etc etc etc... (also sick of the global warming debate).

I read a facinating article recently (and also found numerous others on the same subject... google the correlation between temperature and CO2 levels in the global warming debate) regarding Algore's (pronounced similar to Igor...) data and even the very visual he uses in his dog and pony show.

It shows the results of ice core examinations which clearly indicate a parallel rise and fall of both temperature and CO2 over several thousand years. A correlation would seem to indicate logically a cause and effect relationship... and we of course know that CO2 has been named the cause by the Left. Here is the funny part... in his own graph (and more clearly in the actual data he based his graph upon) the spikes in temperature always slightly precede the spikes in CO2. This is easily overlooked by those emotionally engaged in the idea that Republicans are destroying the planet by not caring much about our minuscule CO2 contribution to the Earth's atmosphere, but elementary logic tells you that in a cause and effect relationship... the cause comes before the effect. Now as to what caused the temperatures to change, there are MANY theories, all of which involve powerful forces of nature far beyond human control or influence. So I will enjoy my hamburger today knowing that bovine flatulance will only effect me when I stand behind the cow and is not in any way contributing to future catastrophies.

Beef... it's what's for dinner!

3 comments:

The Irascible Neufonzola said...

I think you've got the wrong tack on this. We shouldn't feel guilt about eating beef...what we are doing is combatting global warming! By slaughtering and feasting on these animals that seek to destroy the planet with their gaseous posterior exhalations, we are doing our part to bring about a stop to global warming. Those that would let these cows live are the ones to blame. Root out the vegetarians! Jail them! Vegans must be expunged from society! PETA is a blot on the face of humanity! Muahahahahahaha!

Of course, if the leftists actually understood economics, they would of course realize that by eating beef we raise its value and encourage more breeding of beef, but hey, if leftists actually understood economics they wouldn't be leftists, now would they? :D Maybe we shouldn't bring that up, then...

So go ahead, throw that 20lb beef brisket on the smoker, light up some renewable fuel in the form of wood chunks underneath it, and let's BBQ our climate woes away!

The Irascible Neufonzola said...

PS: I honestly wish I could lay claim to "root out the vegetarians" as a purposeful pun, but unfortunately it was a blessed accident, I cannot claim it.

Percussivity said...

You should submit that slogan to the Beef Counsel.