...are the ones you really should have had much... MUCH sooner than you did.
At my office, specifically in the lower level men's room of my office, more specifically in the single handi-accessible stall on a handrail... sits and always has sat a can of Oust® air sanitizer (presumabely it is not the same can but my point is that this can is always replaced with a new one upon depletion, and thus always there on the rail in the single handi-accessible stall in the lower level men's room at my office.) OK so there is this can of Oust® air sanitizer and I am happy it is there because it is quite often needed though unfortunately not often enough used. I, being the conscientious guy that I am, always use it when I feel its use is necessary. This policy has been in place for the last 11 months that being the duration of my employment to date at my company.
Now I am not particularly a germ-a-phobe or conspicuously obsessive/compulsive... but if I can avoid particular germs I will do so. I realize we inhale millions of germs every day but I cannot stop breathing and would never be caught dead wearing a paper breath mask unless sanding drywall. I am talking about surface contact germs. I suppose I should get on to the afore mentioned revelation.
As I was washing my hands at the sink after concluding the business which I entered the men's room to conduct, it occured to me...
I feel it is safe to estimate that 100% of everyone that picks up that can of Oust® air freshener...
At my office, specifically in the lower level men's room of my office, more specifically in the single handi-accessible stall on a handrail... sits and always has sat a can of Oust® air sanitizer (presumabely it is not the same can but my point is that this can is always replaced with a new one upon depletion, and thus always there on the rail in the single handi-accessible stall in the lower level men's room at my office.) OK so there is this can of Oust® air sanitizer and I am happy it is there because it is quite often needed though unfortunately not often enough used. I, being the conscientious guy that I am, always use it when I feel its use is necessary. This policy has been in place for the last 11 months that being the duration of my employment to date at my company.
Now I am not particularly a germ-a-phobe or conspicuously obsessive/compulsive... but if I can avoid particular germs I will do so. I realize we inhale millions of germs every day but I cannot stop breathing and would never be caught dead wearing a paper breath mask unless sanding drywall. I am talking about surface contact germs. I suppose I should get on to the afore mentioned revelation.
As I was washing my hands at the sink after concluding the business which I entered the men's room to conduct, it occured to me...
I feel it is safe to estimate that 100% of everyone that picks up that can of Oust® air freshener...
does so...
immediately...
AFTER WIPING THEIR ASS!!!
My solution:
11 comments:
I saw this coming in the first few sentences. Oh my....
I do enjoy unnecessary verbosity. I nearly emptied the bottle of Purell at my desk.
Next time I am at your house, I'm giong to take some random object of yours and touch it to your toilet without you knowing it.
Ya know what a great product would be??? An unscented Lysol fogger (like a bug bomb). Kill every microorganism in your house. But seriously, stuff like that doesn't usually bother me unless I think about it and yesterday I thought about it obviously.
Hmmm... word verification is 'choke'. Curious...
I was making a vague- apparently very vague- reference to a Seinfeld episode.
prigstr?
I vaguely, very vaguely recall that episode.
Is it just me or has Googlogger, in the past few months, radically changed their Word Verification generator to output "English style" false words instead of random characters? It does indeed make for a more usable interface I think, but some strange ones are created. Mine is "educt", apparently a withdrawal of an edict. So if a Pope issues an edict, then realizes he really screwed the pooch on that one, I mean Class A boner, and all the other Popes are laughing their asses off and posting cellphone videos of his edict to Youtube, then His Holiness can issue an "educt" which retracts his earlier edict while maintaining technical infallibility.
"Hawdes"...a subsection of the afterlife themed from the TV show Hee Haw where sinners with good musical taste are banished.
Now you realize that Gary Larson has already covered that comic ground yes?
Indeed I do.
Word verification: finnesh. There are so many ways to go here I don't know where to start.
Finnesh: [A lack of] refinement or delicacy of workmanship, structure, or texture due to intense inebriation, which also results in gross spelling errors and slurred speech.
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